Taking the Scenic Route

Some more comments on AAP guidelines.  This time, on food for babies.

Ditch the rice cereal and mashed peas, and make way for enchiladas, curry and even — gasp! — hot peppers.

This part I agree with.  A part of the reason is that I realized, when I was on parenting boards, that the standard American advice for babies was totally different than it was in other cultures.  Even as close as Mexico people feed their kids ‘normal’ foods, not the bland tasteless stuff we tend to give our kids.  I also questioned starting with grains (but did it because that is what I was ’supposed’ to do) since the grains have more chances of allergies than meats (at least in my family). 

Another reason I agree with this is experience.  When Zane was a little guy, Zach always worked to keep his hot sauce covered food away from Zane, saying “you aren’t going to like this”.  Well, Zane got faster and snatched some chips covered in hot sauce, but instead of being deterred by the taste, wanted more and cried when we tried to take it away.  We sure didn’t want him to eat potato chips at 9 – 12 mo, so we put some on crackers, and then whole wheat bread.  Bread with hot sauce is still one of his favorite things to eat. 

Now, as a preschooler, we go through a lot of hot sauce.  You know how some kids won’t eat anything unless you put ketchup on it?  Well, Zane will try just about anything if we put hot sauce on it. (even things that make me shudder, like apples with hot sauce dribbled on it)  He will eat curries and other spicy food too, but spits out typical “kid’s food” (unless we put hot sauce on it).  I can attest to the fact that this did not come from me.  I didn’t eat spicy food until my mid-20s. 

Peanut butter doesn’t have to wait until after the first birthday.

This I have issues with.  It just seems irresponsible and I certainly hope they consulted some qualified allergists before recommending this.  I am no Dr., but I am educated, and when I heard that you shouldn’t feed kids peanut butter (among other allergens) I wanted to know why.  I was also taking an Anatomy & Physiology class about the time he was starting to eat regular food, so it was a great jumping off point to learn about how the intestines & immune system develop.  (My A&P professor had a special interest in immune response and did a lot of research on it, so he talked a lot about the immune system in class, and was happy to delve in deeper if you talked to him after class).  I understand that for a majority of kids, food allergies aren’t a big concern.  However, I have some food allergies (onion family being the main one with some other sensitivities), my dad has a lot of food allergies (most fruits, some veggies, and some dairy), and one of my cousin’s children had severe allergies.  (food dyes, dairy, corn, and some other things).  I am not willing to adopt the idea that I should just ignore possible allergens for a child with an immature digestive system. 

Take rice cereal, for example. Under conventional American wisdom, it’s the best first food. But Butte says iron-rich meat — often one of the last foods American parents introduce — would be a better choice.

Dr. David Ludwig of Children’s Hospital Boston, a specialist in pediatric nutrition, says some studies suggest rice and other highly processed grain cereals actually could be among the worst foods for infants.

“These foods are in a certain sense no different from adding sugar to formula. They digest very rapidly in the body into sugar, raising blood sugar and insulin levels” and could contribute to later health problems, including obesity, he says.

This part makes complete sense to me.  It is what I was thinking when I was starting to feed Zane solids, but everything in the literature said to feed babies grains first.  I skipped to more ‘normal’ foods pretty quickly (I think we only went through about 2 boxes of cereal) because it just didn’t make sense to me.  I did stick with ‘baby’ food that first summer/early fall because we were living out of suitcases for the most part and I didn’t really have access to my full kitchen, just the very basics.  So, we bought more jars of food than we planned to.  Once we were settled again (shortly after Zane was 9mo) we never really bought jarred food again, just made food and mushed it up.  This next time around, I am still doing the ‘one food at a time’ thing, but I don’t think I will start with grains.  I will still wait until around 6 months though.  (longer if they aren’t trying to grab it off of our plates). 

CNN Article:  Experts seek to debunk baby food myths

Jennifer Z

The American Academy of Pediatrics, hoping to settle some of the most hotly debated and emotional issues related to the care of newborns, is for the first time endorsing routine pacifier use and explicitly advocating a ban on babies sleeping with their parents.

This is, without a doubt, one of the dumbest, most uneducated statements I have ever heard.  What complete morons!  My issues with this are:

1. We have only been putting babies in cages for the last 100 years or so.  Since time began, until recently, babies slept with their mothers.  That is how God made us.  Mothers are designed to feel uncomfortable hearing a baby cry in the next room because it isn’t how it is supposed to be.  God built in an internal alarm system to tell us what was ok and what wasn’t, we just need to listen to it.  Babies are designed to wake every few hours to nurse so they never go into a really deep sleep and forget to breathe.  This is how it is designed!  Introducing formula and separating babies from their parents both interfere with a normal relationship.
2. The way they do the ‘official’ statistics (which, by the way, are devised by the organization of crib manufacturers) is to lump all times a baby dies OUTSIDE a crib as co-sleeping.  So, it doesn’t make a difference to them whether it is a sober mother practicing safe sleeping guidelines, or a drunk uncle who falls asleep with the baby next to him on the couch for their purposes.  If you take out all the drug/alcohol/sleep apnea & other sleep disorders (all things you should NEVER do when co-sleeping), then co-sleeping is the CLEAR winner. There is a much higher death rate for babies left in cribs.
3. Infant mortality is lower in countries that routinely co-sleep.  (I think Japan is one of them, but I could be off the mark)
4. They acknowledge that a baby should not get into too deep of a sleep because that is the trait that is most likely to lead to SIDs.  That is the premise of using a pacifier…if they are sucking, then they aren’t getting into as deep of a sleep.  Even my very mainstream neighbor thought that was stupid…she can’t keep the pacifier in her child’s mouth, even though she wants to.  I find it so backwards that you would take away a natural, normal avenue of keeping the child from falling into a deep sleep and replacing it with a piece of plastic.  What arrogance to think the man-made inventions are superior to what God made!
5. Instead of an all-or-nothing attitude in regards to co-sleeping, why is nobody giving out good information on how to co-sleep correctly.  It was so difficult to find information because the crib manufacturers don’t want you to hear ANY indication that there is a good way to do it.  (which is compounding the problem because people aren’t doing so in an optimum manner. )  For instance, you follow some of the same guidelines as cribs…no fluffy pillows under infants, no flimsy blankets, no toys or stuffed animals, some way to insure the baby doesn’t fall out of the bed or get wedged into anything – different ways work and we have done several as our child grew, and of course, no drugs, no alcohol, and no sleep apnea, sleepwalking, or other sleep issues that might make you less responsive.
6. On a more personal note…Neither my dh or I could sleep when Zane was even in a bassinet.  Both of us were constantly getting up to make sure he was breathing for the two or three nights we tried to put him in a bassinet next to the bed.  (I don’t think he made it more than 5 or 10 minutes at a time and we were still checking on him)  Putting him in bed with us meant we all got much better sleep.  If his breathing got funny, we would hear it and wake enough to shuffle him a bit so he started breathing right again.  Nobody had to wake up completely to be able to nurse him (he never had to cry, which would wake him more, and I never had to wake up enough to try and walk across a room in the middle of the night.)  I can not fathom how much more sleep deprived I would have been if not for co-sleeping and breastfeeding in those early weeks.  Those newborn days are tough enough, why would anybody want to make them worse!?!

I guess I can add this to the list of ’stupidity of modern medicine’ right along side giving a newborn a Hepatitis B shot when a few hours old.  (you know, since newborns are known for having sex and getting high in those first few weeks)

If I had a dr. try and lecture me on this nonsense, I would be getting a new pediatrician…one with some common sense. 

*sigh*

Well, dance class didn’t go as well today as I was hoping.  He does ok on tap, but does not want to stand still for ballet unless they are moving around.  (like when she is trying to get everybody to hold 1st position)  He is also not getting the ‘wait in line’ aspect.  Some of the other little ones aren’t getting it either, but they just stand there and stare when they aren’t getting it, Zane wants to bolt.  We left 10 minutes early from class because it just wasn’t working today.

I think some of the problem today was that he had a stomach ache, because when he got home he pooped his body weight.  Seriously, 3 huge poops in half an hour.  Insane.  He then took a 3 hour nap, something he doesn’t really do any more.

I am disappointed, but not even close to calling it quits.  I just hoped he would adjust faster since he is older than the last time we had a class.  It is hard to wait for him to do it on his terms sometimes. 

I just talked to mom.  She is going to help us pay for 2 months of “Kid Zone” at the YMCA.  It is the in-house daycare.  He can go there up to two hours a day for $12 a month.  Maybe that will help with his socialization.  I HATE using daycare of any kind, but we obviously have to change strategies because the ‘once a week’ thing isn’t doing it.  He isn’t coping well with Sunday School either, but maybe we just need to get him exposed to it more and he will adjust a bit better.  2 hours a day seems like a better option right now than an actual preschool, especially since we can’t afford preschool by any stretch of the imagination, especially if it just throwing money at the problem without helping.  After he gets accustomed to 2 hours a day, we will re-evaluate.

My mom said that preschool helped me immensely when I was around Zane’s age.  (a tad bit older, but not by much…probably a lot shorter though. lol)  We know Zach wasn’t verbal until around his 3rd birthday, but by 4 he was right on track….he thinks that he started attending preschool (Montessori) that year.  Since Zane seems to really be following a lot of our traits, it is probably time.  He is so advanced in non-social/verbal areas that it is really hard to try and find the balance.  “age appropriate” computer games, for instance, bore him, but give him a kindergarten or first grade level game (and some harder games) and he is engaged.  He is very obviously very smart, but so lacking in social skills that it is hard for anybody to see that isn’t around him a lot.  Add introversion to that and it makes it a real challenge…how do we help him gain confidence socially without scaring him so bad he retreats. 

Parenting is so hard sometimes.

Warning:  grossness ahead

You know those pregnancy tickers?  If they made one for “how long since I last puked”, I would have to reset it again.  Ugh! 

Macaroni and Mama Moments

I think that there is a conspiracy keeping me from making macaroni & cheese.  I started water boiling, went to move my Dr. appointment (the original is the morning when Zach has to take a midterm, and administer a midterm later that day), and when I came back it had boiled over.  I dumped it and started again (the last thing I want is concentrated Wichita tap water.  ewwww!). 

This time, about the time it started to boil, I heard a whimpering child in the next room and discovered a major poop accident and an upset little boy.  I cleaned up the major mess with wipes (causing the puking).  It was terrible.  I am trying to comfort him because he is miserable, puking (me puking, not him), which makes him more upset, and trying desperately to let him know it isn’t his fault, while trying not to breath.  I take him to the tub to finish because wipes were not doing it.  Give him a quick bath, get him out of the tub wrapped in a towel and run back to the stove.  The water has all but boiled out…again.  So, I dump water, start again.  Get him dried off and dressed.  Clean off the poop smeared surfaces, notice the water boiling and add the noodles.  (whew, finally!) 

He doesn’t seem to be interested in going back to playing.  He wasn’t all out crying any more, but still upset.  I sat down to talk to him and he crawled up on my lap and just held on tight.  I grab a blanket, cover him up, and snuggle with him, talking to him.  He is on the cusp of sleep when the timer goes off, and still clinging to me.  I sigh, and just let it go.  He needed me more right that second than my queasy stomach needed macaroni and cheese.  Within a minute or two, he was asleep, still holding on tight, so I stayed.  I know I will miss this when he gets older…when nothing will do but mama, and mama can make things better.  Macaroni will just have to wait.

In answer to a comment on my “food” post:

That is how I make “milk gravy”.  It is the kind of gravy you use for things like chicken fried steak, dried beef / chipped beef and gravy (you add the chipped beef at the end), and biscuits and gravy.  (Red State Fare.  lol)  This is what that particular discussion was about…gravy for biscuits.   If you are making gravy for the thanksgiving turkey, for instance, I go with more of a broth with cornstarch type thing.  (similar to what you do to thicken sauces for stir fry, just in a larger bulk).  To use cornstarch as a thickener, you blend cold water and cornstarch in a cup, whisk until there are no lumps, then slowly pour the cornstarch mixture into the heated broth/sauce while mixing vigorously.  Keep stirring as it heats to a boil.  As it boils, it suddenly thickens.

Milk gravy is an opaque gravy, and as my dh pointed out, a very non-Jewish thing to do (because mixing meat and milk is a no-no for that culture).  If you don’t brown the flour very long, it is a ‘white gravy’.  The longer you brown the flour & drippings, the darker it gets, although it is unlikely to be a deep brown.  The cornstarch gravy makes a more clear, shiny gravy like you typically see at Thanksgiving and for roasts.  If I have enough pan drippings, I sometimes make a bit of each for a big meal if I have time, but usually just make what compliments the meat the best.

Food

After the Brookville Hotel meal, I was curious to see if the recipe for the Cole Slaw was online someplace.  It was the first time I have ever had it and actually liked it.  (now if I can find a potato salad recipe that I don’t hate I will be set for potluck picnic lunches).  I found it here.  Whipping cream and vinegar…makes me wonder if has a Mennonite background…German at least.  lol.  No wonder I liked it. 

In my search, I discovered a site that discusses food called eGullet.  They discuss the finer points of cooking and recipes.  Very interesting.  I realized that a lot of people have problems with pan-frying chicken.  I was intrigued.  What is so hard about chicken?  You dredge in seasoned flour and stick it in a pan with oil.  Well, I discovered that there were a lot of subtle variations to chicken.  I am going to try soaking in buttermilk some time and see if it has any real effect.  I found the discussion really enlightening and kept reaching back into my memory to think of how I do it…I guess I never really thought about it much.  I just did it.

One of the funny things was the discussion of making gravy.  Gravy was one of those things I just never really thought about.  When there were multiple people complaining that there were no good directions, my first thought was “that’s easy!  I was making gravy at 10 years old!  The *trick* is to just keep stirring it and you will never get any lumps”  So, all full of myself, I thought I would try and write out a response since I actually *knew* how to do it very well.

So…here goes:  After you are done frying/roasting your meat, you put the pan back on the heat.  If you are making it with no drippings, or there isn’t enough fat, just put butter (or oil, or lard…just some kind of fat that works with what you are making) in the pan.  ok…better put an amount here….but it depends on how much you are making…you just do it until it ‘looks right’.  I’ll skip it and come back.   Now, once the fat has heated up, you take a handful of flour and add it, whisking briskly.  Keep adding it until it ‘looks right’.  Then you keep stirring around the clumps, letting it brown just a bit…you know, until it ‘looks right’  Um….I am beginning to see a problem pattern here. Then you add ‘enough’ milk and keep stirring.  ‘Eventually’, it will start to boil and then thicken quickly.  When it ‘looks right’ you are done. 

As it turns out, you have to buy a membership to actually post at that site, so I wasn’t able to share my wisdom *cough*cough*.  I really feel sorry for somebody who was never shown this.  I don’t really remember learning how to make gravy initially.  I know I learned from my mom, because my paternal Grandma, who was known far and wide for her cooking, had mom do the gravy for her at big meals because she did a better job.   After examining the process a little more, I realize that I really was blessed to have people around me while growing up who taught and encouraged me to cook.  There are some things you just can not learn well from a book.  I do remember making spackle a few times while trying to learn the process.  I was sure my mom never guessed (she was out in the field farming and I was making lunches), but looking back, she was sure to notice that I would sometimes go through a gallon or two of milk trying to get the gravy right. 

I wish I would have been just a smidge older to learn the really fine points of bread baking from that Grandma.  She wasn’t really baking and cooking any more by the time my skills got refined enough to have picked up the subtle things.  I might have to ask my older cousin who was able to learn from her as a young housewife.  Grandma bragged about her baking and ethnic cooking. (edited to clarify:  Grandma bragged about my cousin’s cooking, never her own cooking)  I remember more of the ethnic stuff than the bread baking  (Vernike / kaese berouggi & poppyseed rolls for those who know what I am talking about), and I am thankful to have watched her do it at least a few times so I have that in my brain.  I really ought to try some of the ethnic stuff and see how it turns out and how much I need to work on it to pass it down.  I have a feeling I can find some guinea pigs around here some place. 

Well, I certainly got behind on blogging.  So, a catch-up post:

Neighbors

Probably the most dramatic thing that happened this week.  I got a call from Ann, her voice shaky, asking me to come over and let myself in.  My heart dropped…I knew something was very, very wrong.  When I got there she was having all the symptoms of a heart attack.  (severe chest pain, left side weakness, sweating profusely, nausea, shortness of breath).  She had called her FIL to come watch the kids and wanted me to take her to the hospital as soon as he got there.  I ran and got Zach & the keys, and Zach stayed there until he arrived so we could get going.  I haven’t driven like that in years.

We got there, they rushed her in and got her hooked up to monitors & did a chest x-ray.  They ‘determined’ that she had not had a heart attack.  I really felt like they did not do nearly enough testing or monitoring before declaring that.  21 year old females do not ‘just’ have those symptoms.  Her great-grandpa had a heart attack at 20, her grandmas have heart problems, her mom has some sort of major health thing (not sure what, but she said she was in too much pain to come to the hospital and I know that *something* is going on, just don’t know what), I think her (non-custodial when growing up) dad has problems too, and she and her brother both have asthma.  Plus, all the symptoms she has had for the last week.  This is the 3rd time in the last 1-2 weeks she has been in the dr’s office or hospital for chest pain.  (plus the ovarian cyst immediately before).  She is going to an OB/GYN to have her hysterectomy scheduled early this next week.  I am BEGGING her to see an actual cardiologist, specifically a pediatric cardiologist (my SIL still sees a ped. card even though she is mid-late 20s now), before she even considers going under anesthesia.  The Dr. told her to go home and take some Ibuprofen because “in all his years, he has never seen somebody so young with heart disease, so he doesn’t think there is a problem”.  (Yeah.  That is what several Drs. told my mom about Endo in a 12 year old too.  They were WRONG)  What arrogance.  You know, sometimes the hoof beats ARE Zebras.

I can’t help but be angry at her dh though.  Once again, he decided he couldn’t take off work to come see his wife in the hospital, even though she had major life-threatening symptoms.  He is just bitching that she is wasting money racking up more medical bills.    

On a happier note, her quest to get her high school diploma is going well.  She is averaging an A, and actually got 100% on her test in Math yesterday.  WooHoo!  Tonight Zach helped tutor her for a half an hour or so on ratios.  Yesterday I helped her with some basic Whole Number theory.  She is really driven to complete it as fast and as well as she can.  Her dh is growing less and less helpful to her as she is going on  (can we just do it tomorrow, I’m tiiirrred)  No surprise.  I suspect he will do every thing he can to sabotage her as she gets closer. 

In much lighter news…

I found some yarn in the clearance rack at the yarn store that perfectly matches the interior/trim on Zane’s winter coat.  It is a wool acrylic blend a perfect for hat and mittens.  Now I just have to decide what I want it to look like.  YEAH!

His ballet shoes finally came in.  This Tuesday should go a lot smoother when he has something to change into after the tap portion of the class.  Very good. 

My camera was returned to me!

I lent out my camera to Robert.  (Those who know me know that is a MAJOR deal).  He needed it to take pictures of products for the website he is launching for his wife’s business (wool jersey diaper covers and other crafty things).  There were some old pictures on there that I am going to share, even though some of them are from the middle of September now.

Zane drawing “Thomas the Tank Engine” in sidewalk chalk (Sept 10)  (wearing my Birki clogs. lol.)

And earlier tonight, we went bowling for the first time in about 5 years.  The camera batteries died after two pictures, but here they are.

Putting on the shoes.  (Ann putting on Zane’s shoes while I get a blanket for her little one)

The first throw

Happy momments

I just spent the last 1/2 or so watching my stomach move around.  I see movement and can see the karate kicks punch out a good inch or more.  Dang.  Zane was active, but I don’t remember being this active this early.  I am a little scared.  lol.  Zane already never stops moving and is highly spirited.  I seriously can’t imagine a more intense child.  Yikes!

I took this from Phoebe’s site because I laughed so hard.

For those familiar with the very popular If you give a mouse a cookie book, here is a version for parents.

If you give a mom a muffin

If you give a mom a muffin,
She’ll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She’ll pour herself some.
Her three-year-old will spill the coffee.
She’ll wipe it up.
Wiping the floor, she’ll find dirty socks.
She’ll remember she has to do laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She’ll trip over boots and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her
she has to plan for supper.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She’ll look for her cookbook
(”101 Things To Do With a Pound of Hamburger” ).
The cookbook is setting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.
The check book is in her purse
that is being dumped out by her two-year-old.
She’ll smell something funny.
She’ll change the two-year-old’s diaper.
While she is changing the diaper, the phone will ring.
Her five-year-old will answer and hang up.
She’ll remember she wants to phone a friend for coffee.
Thinking of coffee will remind her
that she was going to have a cup.
And chances are… If she has a cup of coffee,
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.
-Author Unknown